I still haven't started my placement exam due to the graduation events that came up this week. I didn't think I would even be slightly fazed on graduation night but what moved me was that after bitterness between two people for two years, I gave them both written notes about how I felt. If it were the old me, I probably wouldn't have bothered trying to stay on good terms with those people, much less give them cards with kind and sincere words. But something made me want to make peace. It's like my warrior spirit was smothered and out came this mini Mother Teresa...ok I'll never be that good. You catch my drift?
So what ended up happening graduation night was the end of this silent ongoing battle between two people and me. This battle ended so well that we hugged and I cried like a fool afterwards. At that moment, I felt my soul was cleansed. At 1:00 a.m, i lied awake in my bed thinking of the events. For once, I wasn't an asshole who just sought revenge against those who disliked me. With some initial discomfort, I did what I think was the best choice I could've made and I'm pleasantly surprised at myself.
Friday night, I had my graduation party at my house. My godmother did such an amazing job putting everything together from putting cute decorations, cooking awesome food, and giving me all sorts of nice keepsakes. I felt a lot of love from everyone that night. Most of my Odyssey of the Mind team was there and we reminisced about our amazing season. Andrea was such a good sport dancing with my cousins all night and I was surprised to see someone there: Sang.
During my junior year, Sang and I talked all the time and I felt a really strong connection with him. I really liked him but during the last two months of the 2009-2010 school year, something happened that our relationship kinda became cold. After he graduated, I didn't see him at all until the day of my party, where he showed up with these beautiful flowers for me. I was so pleased that he had come because it was the first time I had seen him in a year and I missed him. My stomach hurt all night and I at first thought I was just nervous to be with Sang or something ridiculous like that but it turned out to be my period...great huh? We sat together and spoke to each other the whole time. He was so kind about my bossy ways and accompanied me everywhere I went. I appreciated it so much and that night really made me think about him a lot today.
At noon on Saturday, there was a bouquet of about 12 balloons from the party just hanging out in my dining room. "Go outside and let them go", my mom said. So I untied the strings from the chair and went outside. With the balloons in my hand, I remembered the times I was 7 years old and I liked to imagine that one day I could fly up into the air if I collected enough balloons to lift me up. The wind was raging and suddenly I was scared.
I didn't want to let go of the balloons. No, it's not that I thought they were too awesome to be let go but some fear just overcame me. "Let them go," my mom insisted. "All together?" I asked stupidly. "No" she responded. "One at a time. Make a wish before you let the wind take them away." I made a wish and slowly released my grasp on one of the strings. One at a time, I let them rise into the air and felt a sense of emptiness. The day of my own departure is coming soon and I have to make the best of this summer.
"Look at that black and silver balloon," my mom gasped. "I can still see it rising up in the clouds. " It was true. One of the balloons I had let go first was continuing on in its ascendence. I kept my eyes on the little moving speck till my eyes could no longer stand the intensity of the sun.
"Dina," my mom said. "Like the balloon, you will reach great heights."
Sitting silently in my room,
Dina Starr
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